The Talmud, however, illuminates and approves of more obscure cases as well. To explain the discrepancy, the Talmud (Sanhedrin 19b) states that Michals sister, Merav, actually gave birth to the children, but Michal raised them. Needless to say, such a process of questioning can be traumatic for the young teen. Although Jewish tradition considers the most acceptable option for a couple is to reproduce and bear their own offspring, adoption is a possible solution for couples who cannot have children. You find things that make them feel a sense of belonging., Though the Bruks had to deviate from their expected path to building a family, they say they wouldnt have it any other way. The rabbis conclude: Whoever brings up an orphan in his home is regarded, according to Scripture, as though the child had been born to him.. [5] However, this interpretation raises a number of questions in relation to lineage and biological status, which is a core value in Halacha. When an adopted child is born Jewish, the adoptive parents need to determine the childs tribal affiliation: Kohen, Levite, or Yisrael. According to Jewish Law, a non-Jewish child must be informed that they have been adopted and also converted to Judaism. Counter propositions made by notable contemporary Rabbis argue that there are grounds for leniency towards the rules of Yichud in the case of adoption. The news, delivered at a New York City fertility clinic during one of the couples trips from Montana, flipped our whole life on its head, recalled Chavie, 36. Download our mobile app for on-the-go access to the Jewish Virtual Library, Menstruation and Family Purity (Taharat HaMishpacha), Bar (or Bat) Mitzvah, 1998 - 2022 American-Israeli Cooperative Enterprise. In Genesis 16:2 Sarah offered her maidservant, Hagar, to her husband Abraham as a mistress, with whom he could have children that she would raise as her own. On the one hand, many rabbinic authorities consider adoption as a way of fulfilling the commandment "be fruitful and multiply" for those who physically cannot. Put another way, the one who brings up a child is to be called its father (or mother).. In particular, the sense that they have been abandoned by their birth parents makes some adopted children feel confused about their identities, even if they were converted according to the requirements of their adoptive parents denomination. This mitigates the invalidating status of a Giyyoret being subsumed under the Passul Halachic status of being "be-ezkat zona", and hence ensuring her being under the Halachically Kosher status of "be-ezkat betulla", and as a result, fully eligible to marry a Kohen. Interestingly, though, there was no Hebrew word for adoption until the 20th century, when Israeli lexicographers chose ametz, which comes from the same root as amatz, meaning strength or fortitude.
[14], Many Poskim, most notably Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson (the Lubavitcher Rebbe),strongly contests this leniency. This is a ceremony that takes place when a Jewish woman has a natural birth of a firstborn male, and neither of the biological parents are descendants of Kohanim or Levites. They recognise that the purpose of procreation is not just giving birth, but also raising a child and passing on Jewish values. The formal requirements for a valid conversion include; the presence of three Rabbis in order to form a Beth Din, an immersion in a ritual bath (mikvah), and a ceremonial circumcision for all males (Brit Milah). [2][3] However, according to this view, an older child may not be adopted unless all the laws of Yichud are observed. You find things they connect with. This week I finally have three kids under one roof. They were mostly unfamiliar with the experience. Another serious potential problem in the case of Jewish birth parents is whether the child is or is suspected to be a mamzer. Example: Yes, I would like to receive emails from Jewish Journal.
(JTA) In many ways, Chavie and Chaim Bruk are the archetype of Chabad emissaries. Jacobs wife Rachel had also been experiencing barrenness, and in Genesis (30:3), just as Sarah did with Abraham, Rachel gave her maidservant, Bilhah, to her husband Jacob, in order to have children. [5] The law also pertained that there was to be no adoption of a person over the age of 18, and that the prospective adopter needed to be at least 18 years older than the adoptee. Abram said further, "Since You have granted me no offspring, my steward will be my heir". Yanklowitz has fostered eight children with his wife and, through his organization, worked with 29 family units to pursue fostering and adoption. [15], In 1981, the 'Adoption of Children Law' was updated to contain the religious matching clause in Section 5. Less than a year after they adopted Chaya, the couple traveled to New Jersey to meet their second daughter, Zeesy, who was a baby when they met her for the first time at a car rental agency at Newarks airport. Pronounced: MITZ-vuh or meetz-VAH, Origin: Hebrew, commandment, also used to mean good deed. Regardless of social attitudes, if a black, Asian, or Native American child is converted properly, he or she is fully Jewish. A mamzer is an individual who is the product of an adulterous or incestuous union, and he or she is traditionally not allowed to marry a Jew of legitimate birth. But our tradition has nothing but praise for the manner in which Moses was raised in Pharaohs daughters household. Chavie has come to believe that she didnt have biological children because adoption was the path that I was supposed to take., Chaim and Chavie Bruk, seen here with four of their five children, didn't know anyone who had adopted in the Orthodox community when they started building a family. Hes like, I can relate to him. You provide that for them, Chavie said. was theunpatentingInventor of what Im What qualified Joshua to take over a position held by Moses, the greatest prophet, teacher and leader in history? . PA: Jewish Publication Society, 2004; Kolatch, Alfred J. She was adopted by her cousin Mordecai after the death of her biological mother and father. The Voyage of the Exodus Through Cartoonists Eyes, Print Issue: Digital Detox | Jul 22, 2022, Ellie Zeiler: The 18-Year-Old Fashion Influencer Dominating Social Media, My Name Is Sara Depicts Jewish WWII Refugee in Ukraine, Barcelona Dreaming Kosher Chicken Paella, Holy Connection: A new book chronicles the strong bond between Hollywood and Israel, New Book Deconstructs Cultural Boycott Against Israel, Fantastical Childrens Book Explains Disappearing Socks, Jennifer Greys Memoir Out of the Corner Is Courageous and Empowering, Actor Harry Shearer Has a Thirst for Journalism, Spielberg, Gyllenhaal, Garfield Among 2022 Jewish Oscar Nominees, Sarah Ifft Decker: Jewish Women in the Medieval World. The adopting family is responsible for the childs upbringing and needs, including food, clothing and an education. Every month they get multiple calls from others in a similar position. In this verse, the act of Bilhah giving birth onto Rachels knees is said to signify legitimisation, resembling an ancient adoption ceremony practiced by European and Asiatic people. [7] Biological parents also determine whether a child requires a Pidyon Haben (redemption of the first born). According to the U.S. Census Bureau of 2000, the first U.S. Census to include adopted son/daughter as a category of relationship to the householder, adopted children make up two and a half percent of all children of all ages. In Orthodox tradition, one sends the child to a Jewish school, and at the age of bar or bat mitzvah, one asks the child if he or she wishes to remain Jewish. [13] In comparison, it is not an obligation for an adopted child to mourn the death of their adoptive parents. [5], Given that Israel is the nation state of the Jewish People, Jewish law has impacted the development of its secular laws; and that does not exclude adoption. Rabbi Moshe Feinstein said that the physical contact between adopted children and their parents is not sexual, and therefore the laws of Yichud do not apply in the context of adoption. Generally, when a child is adopted, unless it is certain that his or her birth mother is Jewish, the child is converted to Judaism at that time under the authority of a beit din (Jewish court). Yichud (Jewish chastity law) forbids people of the opposite sex who are not biologically related, from being alone in a room together or from touching each other. The pair blazed a new path. (You can unsubscribe anytime).
Beautiful statements in the Talmud and elsewhere demonstrate our traditions respect for adoptive parents. The prohibition of touching restricts a parent's ability to nurture their child[5] as it prevents them from hugging and kissing, both of which are part of building healthy familial relationships. [5], A common concern when adopting a Jewish-born child is whether the pregnancy has occurred as a result of incest or adultery. Its not a badge of shame to be an adoptive parent, its actually a badge of honor. Therefore, although I believe Judaism encourages adoption as a great mitzvah, adoption needs to be done with the greatest care for the childs development and adult life. The secular procedure for adoption involves the removal of all rights and responsibilities from the biological parents, which are then transferred onto the adoptive parent/s. Jewish Americans, like Americans in general, have various motivations for adopting children. This made it difficult for a predominately Jewish population in Israel to adopt children internationally. Adoption has a long and honorable place in the Jewish tradition.
Given the importance of lineage to the Jewish tradition, Jewish law has never developed a formal legal procedure for adoption. Menny rarely comes across other Jews of color in Bozeman, which is 92.4% white; less than 1% of residents are Black. This teaches that whoever brings up an orphan in his home is regarded, according to Scripture, as though the child had been born to him.[9]. (Courtesy of the Bruk family), And being that I grew up in an observant, religious Chabad background, if I had biological children, adoption would never have crossed my mind not because Im against it or because I dont think its beautiful, she said, but because it wasnt on my radar.. [15] This led to an increase in adoption from overseas, with 2056 adopted children entering the state of Israel between 1998 and 2007.[2]. NY: Jonathan David Publishers, 1989. . Sources: Eisenberg, Ronald L. The JPS Guide to Jewish Traditions. Rabbi Michael Gold, an expert on Jewish family and sexuality issues, points out that the Jewishness of many children adopted by Jewish families continues to be questioned. [5] Based on the Talmudic teachings that when one raises an orphan in their home, "scripture ascribes it to him as though he had begotten him,"[6] Rabbis have argued that the commandment of procreation can also be fulfilled through the act of adoption. Other Jews may be concerned that some adoptees will not fully identify with Judaism despite conversion. Just a year after their diagnosis, the Bruks adopted their first daughter a 2-month-old girl from Russia whom they named Chaya. With each child, the couple grew the number of Orthodox Jews in Montana, where they had moved in 2007, a year after getting married. Pronounced: MICK-vuh, or mick-VAH, Alternate Spelling: mikvah, Origin: Hebrew, Jewish ritual bath. Adoption experts assume the infertility rate is higher among Jews, who tend to postpone marriage and childbirth. I think before no one even knew it was an option, it wasnt even on the table, and thank God, through our journey and through speaking publicly about it we have facilitated many other families through an adoption process, and we have a lot of joy and pride in that., The Bruks are among the handful of Orthodox Jewish families in Montana. Suppressing the identity of the biological parents through closed adoptions is forbidden under Jewish Law. Must the donor be Jewish for the child to be recognized as Jewish? The Bible tells us that Pharaohs daughter adopted Moses and raised him as her own child and even gave him the name by which he would be known for the rest of his life. You may find this an awkward example because Moses later identified with his family of origin and ultimately led a revolt against his adoptive familys dynasty. As such, there are no explicit mentions of the word adoption in the Torah or Talmud. The couple used to travel seven hours back and forth to be able to use a mikvah in Utah, the ritual bath that observant women immerse in monthly following their periods, but eventually built one in Bozeman that is used by Jews from neighboring states. Converted girls are prohibited in Orthodox communities from marrying a Kohen,[3] and therefore they should know of their status. In first Israel talk, Ben Shapiro tells conservatives to import Americas free market, not its woke culture, Dozens of Jewish graves damaged in 600-year-old Turkish cemetery, In provocative move, Russia orders Jewish Agency to cease work and remove staff from country, Russian media reports, How Russias war is undoing 30 years of Jewish community building in Ukraine, The Jewish internet solved this missed connection on the 2 train. We even have a case recounted in the Bible of a child, Oded, being adopted by his grandmother Naomi. With each childs unique story comes a set of challenges whether dealing with physical illness or childhood trauma. Local Jews were shocked. And [Mordecai] was raising Hadassah (that is, Esther) daughter of his uncle for she had no father or mother . Adoption that is practiced in modern secular society derives from Roman Law. Now Theyre Exploiting It. If a couple who has already adopted a boy later gives birth to another boy by natural means, the 'Pidyon Haben' will need to take place for their second child. However, later in the book (2 Samuel 21:8) there is a mention of her five sons. Closed adoptions make it difficult to establish the child's legitimacy and whether or not they are a mamzer.5 Therefore, in order to allow the marriage of an adopted child to another Jew of legitimate birth, their lineage (yichus) must be identifiable8. Another concern of Halachic authorities, is that closed adoptions create the potential for incestuous marriages between Jewish biological siblings who have been separated at birth, consequently leading to the birth of illegitimate children within the Jewish community. According to Jewish law, the biological parents are still compelled to make sure the child has a decent childhood. However, there are several verses that are regarded as describing something akin to adoption. [14] Many Orthodox Rabbis have listed Yichud as another concern why Jewish Law forbids closed adoptions; as adopted children could unintentionally violate the laws of seclusion and physical contact due to being unaware of their adoptive status.[2]. Consort with her, that she may bear on my knees and that through her I too may have children.[8]. Through Yatom, Yanklowitz runs educational programs and provides small grants to families such as the Bruks to encourage them to foster and adopt children. [5] Jewish Law aligns closer with British Common Law, within which the importance of royal bloodlines and class meant that an adoption procedure was never introduced. There is perhaps a greater problem in adopting a Jewish child than in adopting a non-Jewish child because the Jewish community is relatively small compared to the non-Jewish community. In many communities, Orthodox Rabbis have control over access to the mikvah, and can thereby prevent non-Orthodox rabbis from performing non-Orthodox conversions. Dear all, All Rights Reserved. [2], In 1993, Israel ratified the 'Hague Adoption Convention' and as such, the state's laws changed to align with the requirements of this convention. This law created a compromise between Halacha and the secular legal system, in that it had the effect of legally severing the relationship between biological parents and children, in accordance with Roman law, without interfering in the religious laws regarding the prohibition and permission of marriage and divorce. The story of how they built their family isnt as typical. (You can unsubscribe anytime)Constant Contact Use. The most famous example in the Bible, of course, is that of the orphaned Queen Esther, who was raised by her cousin Mordecai. And while the role of adoption may be different than it was in ancient times, adoption continues to shape Jewish families, and indeed, the very nature of the Jewish community. Then They De-Judaized It. [11] Many Orthodox Rabbis will only permit the conversion of a non-Jewish child if the adopted parents are observant Jews. Unlike secular adoption, the relationship between the child and biological parents is never severed, and adoptive parents therefore cannot entirely replace the role of the biological parent. But progeny born to you after them shall be yours". Despite the positive Jewish attitudes toward adoption, Judaisms emphasis on bloodlines and lineage brings a certain ambivalence to the discussion. Adoption is a complicated issuein Jewish law. Therefore, although discouraged, an adopted child is permitted to marry another person from their adoptive family, since they are not blood relatives. We have wonderful examples of adoption in our tradition. The term for adoption did not exist in the Hebrew language until modern times. If the childs biological father is a Cohen or Levi by Jewish tradition, and the child is a boy, so too must he accept these priestly customs. Some couples adopt for altruistic reasons to give homes to older children or children with disabilities. The Talmud teaches us that those who raise children born to others are regarded, according to Scripture, as though they themselves had sired or given birth to them. My goal is when I talk about it publicly is to first of all help people feel less alone, Chavie Bruk said. [4], Jewish names are patronymic, and for converts, the issue arises whether they can use their adoptive father's name. As Jewish communities become more traditional, your main street cred is the number of biological kids you have, said Shmuly Yanklowitz, an Orthodox rabbi in Arizona who founded an organization that advocates for fostering and adoption in the Jewish community. "To her dying day Michal daughter of Saul had no children" (2 Samuel 6:23). Their children attend public and secular private schools there are no Jewish schools in the state. But the reason for most contemporary adoptionsJewish and otherwiseis a married heterosexual couples inability to have a child. The Bruks see themselves as countering the notion that infertility is something to be embarrassed about because there are still pathways to creating large families. Its an honor to be able to take wonderful children who accept us as their parents and we accept them as our beloved children.. In this case, the Jewish biological father then determines the child's tribal status as either a Kohen, Levite or Yisrael. Jewish family service agencies may offer home studies, support groups for adoptees and adoptive families, lectures, conferences, and other services. There is also the great Jewish heroine Esther. Also known as a bris. The attitude that it is permissible to convert a child without his or her initial knowledge and consent is based on the talmudic principle that we can act to a persons benefit without his permission (Ketubbot, 11a). In the religious world we did not know anybody who had adopted. While other denominations allow this, Orthodox Judaism forbids it, maintaining that the convert should be called ben Avraham Avinu (the son of our father Abraham). Of course, adoption today isnt identical to what it was in the biblical or talmudic eras, but the point still holds: Judaism has long recognized, valued and believed in adoption and it still does. The sole exception is of female non-Jewish infants converted Halachically before they reach the age of 3 years and one day, from their birth date.
A gentile child adopted by Jews does not automatically become Jewish upon completion of the secular legal process. Should this be the case, the child is considered illegitimate and takes on the status of a mamzer. It is worth noting (and celebrating) in this day and age in which children are adopted from all over the globe that, partly because of adoption, Jews now come in all colors. You can revoke your consent to receive emails at any time by using the SafeUnsubscribe link, found at the bottom of every email. Ethically, we consider raising someone elses child as a great mitzvah of tzedakah (righteous charity). Please leave this field blank.By submitting this form, you are consenting to receive marketing emails from: Jewish Journal, 3250 Wilshire Boulevard, Los Angeles, CA, 90010, http://www.jewishjournal.com. Judaism contrasts to Roman Law, in that the adoptive parents do not entirely replace the role of the biological parents. The couple live in Montana, one of only a handful of observant Jewish families in the state. [2] However, there are issues that can arise when Rabbis from various religious movements differ on their requirements for conversion. Israel's 'Adoption of Children Law' was introduced by the Knesset in 1960. Shoshana, 16, has struggled with self-harm and an eating disorder as a result of childhood trauma experiences that she recently detailed on her mothers blog. Russia and Auschwitz: First They Ignored It. It is crucial to know who the birth parents are so that, as an adult, the child does not unwittingly marry a prohibited relative. An adopted son does not legally carry on the name of his adoptive father, and therefore in the case of the adoptive father's death, without another biological child, the man would have been considered childless. "Now, your two sons, who were born to you in the land of Egypt before I came to you in Egypt, shall be mine; Ephraim and Manasseh shall be mine no less than Reuben and Simeon. But the family makes an effort to expose him to books featuring diverse characters and music by artists such as Nissim Black, an African-American Orthodox rapper whose songs Menny has learned by heart. We hold by the rabbinic dictum that the teacher of a child is also viewed as the childs parent with all the respect that implies. Since this conversion is performed on a minor, without his or her consent (the halachic terminology is ger katan), at bar or bat mitzvah age the child has the right to either confirm or deny the conversion. [1] The Hebrew word for adoption (immutz), which derives from the verb (amatz) in Psalm 80 verse 16 and 18[2][3][4][5] meaning to make strong, was not introduced until the modern age. [7], Here is my maid Bilhah. [5] Jewish perspectives towards adoption promote two contradictory messages towards nurture and nature[4]. Once the adoptee has consented to the values and responsibilities of becoming a Jew, he (or she) is considered a full member within the Jewish community. Some Jews expect other Jews to look a certain way or insist that a convert doesnt have a Jewish soul. A further consideration in some Jewish communities is the issue of finding a shidduch (mate) for a person without identifiable yichus (lineage). On the one hand, Judaism expresses favourable attitudes towards adoption across religious movements and is widely viewed as a good deed (mitzvah). In this verse, Abraham contemplated adopting his servant Eliezer to be his future heir: But Abram said, "O Lord God, what can You give me, seeing that I shall die childless, and the one in charge of my household is Dammesek Eliezer!" [3][2], This condition of knowing one's biological parents can be fulfilled without actually having to reveal their identity to the child. Before entering into a marriage, the adopted child must consult this person, to ensure there is no possibility of a forbidden union.[3]. Consider Moses. by Rabbi Chaim Jachter", Center of Contemporary Jewish Documentation, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Adoption_in_Judaism&oldid=1094273320, Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License 3.0, This page was last edited on 21 June 2022, at 17:29. This suggests that the rate of adoption in the Jewish community is about double that of the American population at large. [4] Whilst some Reform and Reconstructionist Rabbis will allow conversion without immersion in the mikvah by performing a naming ceremony, adopted children who have not been properly converted will face difficulties in the future should they choose to join a Conservative synagogue, marry a more traditional Jew, or move to Israel. 2022 jewish telegraphic agency all rights reserved. Adopting children has also meant having to grapple with new issues relating to identity. Because most cases of adoption involve conversion, the divisive Who is a Jew? question is at the heart of the issue. That changed two years later when a doctor delivered devastating news: They would not be able to have biological children. Pronounced: hah-lah-KHAH or huh-LUKH-uh, Origin: Hebrew, Jewish law. In 2 Samuel (6:23) it was established that Michal, the wife of King David, never had children throughout her entire life. It wasnt talked about, Chavie said. Comprised of the Mishnah and the Gemara, it contains the opinions of thousands of rabbis from different periods in Jewish history. This clause stipulated that the adopter must be the same religion as the adoptee. When a group of rabbis from across the spectrum recently were asked if Jews believe in adoption, they were unanimous in their endorsement. [4] When a biological parent passes away, the child must fulfil the commandment to honour them by mourning their death, even if they were adopted. Here are the responses of two rabbis advocating adoption. Furthermore, there is also the concern that the Jewish child might be the product of a prohibited marriage where the mother did not receive a get, a religious divorce, from her first husband, and the child is a product of her second marriage. Overall, they estimate that there are some 5,000 households with at least one Jewish person across the sparsely populated state and they can reach some 2,000 of them every year. Furthermore, while the child is not required to mourn, sit shiva, or recite the Kaddish at the loss of a parent; due to the emotional connection it is accepted as common practice. But most biblical and rabbinic references to the practice relate specifically to orphans, a paradigmatically vulnerable class of individuals for which the Bible mandates we protect and care. Orthodox and Conservative rabbis, for example, require tevilah (immersion in a mikveh, or ritual bath) in addition to brit milah (circumcision) for boys. In response to this discrepancy, the Talmud poses an idea similar to adoption; suggesting that her sister Merab gave birth to the children, but Michal was the one who raised them, and they therefore belonged to her. He or she requires formal conversion to Judaismwith the methods varying by denomination. While the adopted child may be permitted to take on the name of the assuming family, according to Jewish law the child is hereditarily tied to his (or her) biological parents. Then came Menny, a boy they adopted as a baby; Shoshana, whom they took in as a 12-year-old; and Chana Laya, adopted as a baby in 2017. In Judaism, a convert also has certain restrictions on who they are allowed to marry. But the Bruks impact extends far beyond the states borders. If the birthmother is Jewish, this means that the child is also Jewish. I was riding my bike this week when I came upon a small pond. Additionally, a child adopted from unknown parents must also go through a conversion to be considered Jewish. I was concerned about the reality of a kid growing up as an Orthodox Jewish boy that happens to be Black coming from Montana and how that integration would work in the broader Orthodox community, he said. It is important to note, however, that racial issues do notand should notfigure in this conversation. The Talmud gives permission to Rabbis to convert a child before the age of consent, based on the principle that we can act to someones advantage even without their permission". In Exodus 2:910, Moses was rescued from the banks of the River Nile by Pharaohs daughter Batyah, who then raised him as her own in the house of Pharaoh. The legislature also resolved the previous issue regarding adoption of the same religion by amending section 13A of the 'Capacity and Guardianship Law'. and when her father and her mother died Mordechai took her, to himself, as a daughter. However, he limits his leniency to when both adoptive parents are alive, married to each other and living in one home;[13] for example an adoptive father may not touch or be alone with his adopted daughter, if his wife has passed away. Ancient laws and modernity are brought together with the embrace of adoption in the Jewish community. [3] For a girl this is age three and for a boy this is age nine. [5] Halachic regulation, directly from Leviticus 21:7, also prohibits a converted girl from marrying a man that is a Kohen.[3].